28
Apr
2016
The Disease of Shame

You have a disease. It’s called “SHAME” | Episode 33

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When you listen to me, you may not hear it… well, sometimes it comes out. But, while I don’t speak with a drawl in my voice, I actually am originally from South Mississippi. Let me say that I know what it’s like…

Put a smile on your face,
when it’s all okay.
Put a smile on your face,
when the flowers bloom that day.
Put a smile on your face,
when it’s all crumbling down.
Put a smile on your face,
when there is nothing but gray around.

Shame.

Josh Armstrong, Shame

Putting on a face

Yeah, as Southerners, we put a smile on our face, even things are not going well. Don’t let others in; don’t let others know. Your problems are YOUR problems. Maybe a friend of family member will have some insight, but we drawn the line there. We bury our fears, we bury our shame. NO ONE must know…

Am I right? Is that how you grew up?

But, is that okay?

We all have things that aren’t great in life, and sometimes things go wrong. You know, you would think that when something was going wrong in our life, the enemy would lie to you and say, “Oh, no! what if someone finds out about THAT. You will be the laughing stock, everyone will despise and hate you. You will never be accepted again. Your family will leave you. And you will be ALL alone…” — Sure, that’s the lie we hear.

The truth is, the enemy wants the exact opposite. He wants you to hide your sin and misgivings. Close it up so no one knows… But, Why? He wants you to stay there, sitting in your shame.

Sitting in your shame. “What if someone finds out?” Sitting in your shame. “You will be the laughing stock.” Sitting in your shame. “Everyone will despise, hate, loath you for what you did.” Sitting in your shame. “You’re family leaves. You’re never accepted anywhere.” Sitting in your shame. You will be all alone…

A Lesson from Science

Biologically speaking, when something that is foreign to our body comes in — a splinter, graphite from a pencil, maybe one of your own bones gets out of place and is not sitting just right, especially when covered up internally or just under the skin, it can cause toxic and allergic reactions, inflammation, or infection, requiring antibiotics or even surgery for removal. (Source: http://www.nursingcenter.com/static?pageid=1037067).

When you allow that issue in your life to be covered up, SHAME is that infection. Underneath the surface, that shame will be inflamed and will slowly spread to the point it will consume and affect a piece of everything you do…

Doing one of 2 things, this cycle of Shame, is a spiraling, in your mind, whirlwind that will get the better of you and cause you to fail faster than reality can move. James 1:15 tells us that “Sin when it’s fully grown brings forth death.” And the enemy says, “This sin and shame you fell leads to death anyway. Why not end it all early.”

  1. If he can’t first convince you to end it all, he’ll do the next best thing. 
  2. He will just push you to hide your issues.

Shame is powerful.

The enemy KNOWs that when you are hiding your issues, you are most likely NOT to grow, staying put. He doesn’t want to see you succeed. He wants you to fail, and FAIL Hard. Why? Maybe your falling will bring discouragement to others and others will fail too. But he lies and tell you that you are all alone in this. “Don’t care about others. You are alone and the one with the problem.”

So, what do we do?

Selfishly, we just want it all to quietly go away, right?

What does God want?

Well, I am sorry to remind you of this, but God wants it out in the open. “What?!” you say. “God wants me to be a laughing stock and my friends and family to leave?!” … No, quite the opposite.

In the middle of what you are going through, remember that there is healing in confessing. Freedom in accountability. When you do that, the shame leaves. You may still feel the affects, scars of shame. Even after a surgery, theres a recouping time to heal. In the same way, you might still the affects, but the infection of shame has no hold on your any longer, unless you keep retreating to it. James 5:16 says, “Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed.” Verse 15 says that true believers will forgive what you’ve done. Verses 19 and 20 says, “if anyone among you wanders from the truth and someone brings him back, let him know that whoever brings back a sinner from his wandering will save his soul from death and will cover a multitude of sins.” And not the kind of covering that brings shame, but the kind that erases them, forgives, brings healing, life and forgiveness.

When you walk beyond shame, into forgiveness, you can live again in the freedom Christ talks about having here on Earth as it is in Heaven. God wants us to walk in freedom from your shame. That begins with confession to one another.

Did this help you?

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Photo credit: Vinod Velayudhan

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