So it has been a little while since I have blogged. Being mommy (and homeschooling, podcasting, and traveling to the other side of the world) has taken up a lot of time — go figure, haha!
Our foster care journey is an ever changing experience.
If you have been following the blog, then you know at one point we had 3 little foster loves on top of our 3 little bio loves. At the time we had them it was completely insane and full of chaos and stress, but God was so in the middle of it! Now those 3 have been placed with a family member, and after our trip to Hungary, we are back at it.
This time we have a newborn. When I say newborn I mean NEW born. She came to us just 3 days ago as a 2 day old!
I am in love, seriously.
I can honestly say I loved the 3 little loves we had previously… But with all the chaos, they were easier to say goodbye to. I still cried but I knew that it was time.
I already know that this little one will be hard, so so so hard to say goodbye to. There is just something that a peaceful little newborn has that is so beautiful and precious to a mama’s heart. The constant dependence that you embrace with everything to care for this tiny, fragile life is not something you can just “get over.” I have heard over and over again “I could never do that, it would be so hard to let go” and can I tell you, it is. It is so hard.
We have had 5 “foster loves” before our current one and I still feel like 5 pieces of my heart are walking around somewhere and I have no idea where. But God does!
Foster parenting is one of the hardest callings I’ve faced…
Not only do we have to jump through millions of hoops daily, but we have to do it while caring for children who may or may not reciprocate your feelings and are probably not thrilled to be in your home, no matter what situation they came from.
But I wouldn’t change it for the world!
We get to be a part of loving these kiddos in their darkest hour. When they have lost everything and everyone they have ever known, we get to be the ones who speak life and truth into their reality. We get to be the ones who love, holding nothing back and hopefully giving them a glimpse of their Savior through our love!
Is it hard? Absolutely! But I am not aware of the scripture that says doing what God has called you to is easy.
What if you dared to trust God with your heart? What if you embraced His calling to love like He loves? What if you allowed God to put you into heartbreaking situations so He can put the pieces back together in a more beautiful picture?
You are God’s plan, friends! I am not saying that everone is called to be a foster parent but everyone is called! We are all called to love fiercely, even when it hurts!
So, will you dare to follow Him no matter what?
Will you dare to trust Him even when it’s hard, even when it’s scary?
I don’t know what your calling is. Part of mine is currently wrapped in the body of a beautiful 5 day old. I’m daring to pour out all I have to love her, knowing she is not mine to keep forever.
As we all should, I must re-learn daily what it means to trust my Daddy God with my heart!